Random Quotes from the WIP Household, Part XV

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Hey, I put a little bit of this on, then suddenly I get Justin Bieber in the house.

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That could so be a quote if it didn't involve balls.

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"Am I allowed to use the hammer?"

"I don't...know...exactly what that means..."

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If you can't jump, you are of no use to me.

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If I kicked your mom in the face, it might put a strain on our relationship.

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Jesus and Chuck Norris are taking names and kicking ass.

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Random Quotes from the WIP Household, Part XIV

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Don't act like all of a sudden you don't like Simply Red.

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Friend: That's how we learned how to drive, back home, was with the donkey.
Youngest: Oh, so that's how you learned how to drive stick shift.

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Could you imagine if you were allergic to bacon? Your life would be so meaningless.

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Dude, if you were Iggy Pop, I'd like you so much more.

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Me: I don't understand this: "the U(1)y factor of the SM gauge group is within the U(1) factor of the GUT group."
Husband: God, you don't understand anything, do you?

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Chester, you ate all the chips, you fat lard.

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Bacon Pretzel Caramels

Not just bacon pretzel caramels. Bacon pistachio pretzel caramels with Newcastle. Or, little pillows of chewy decadence.

I used this recipe from Lisa at Lisa is Cooking, substituting pistachios for the cashews, and adding crumbled bacon. Because, as everyone knows, bacon makes everything better.

First lay down the pretzels and nuts (and bacon!) in a dish lined with greased foil. Don't skip the grease part, it's completely necessary.

Next pour the cooked sugar mixed with cream and Newcastle (or any other ale you like) on top, and chuck it in the refrigerator until completely chilled.

Then cut into small pieces...

And wrap in wax paper or parchment paper.

Yes, boiling sugar is kind of scary. And it's a freaking mess to clean up afterward. But it's definitely worth it.

Sweet, salty, creamy, chewy, crunchy. And bacon.

Pseudo Filipino Breakfast

My husband was raised by his great-grandfather, who was Filipino. He grew up eating things like this - delicious, filling, cheap, and did I mention delicious?

The basic formula is mostly rice, a couple eggs, and a little meat. Garlic rice is preferred, where you take day-old cold rice, and fry it with garlic (think Chinese fried rice, but without the soy sauce). But you can just as easily mix fried garlic chips into the rice. Cook your eggs however you want. I like over-easy. Husband likes scrambled. But not really scrambled - pour the eggs into a skillet, poke the yolk, let it cook slowly, chop and flip a little. You want the separate areas of white and yolk, not a homogeneous concoction.

For the meat - the best would be longanisa. Or tocino. If you don't have access to either of those, cube some Spam and fry it in a hot skillet. Or, even better (IMHO), although it does sound strange at first, cube up some hot dogs, and fry in a skillet with a little bit of mustard (plain yellow is fine) and black pepper. Seriously. Something about the mustard and pepper makes it taste...not like a hot dog...

For garnish, add sliced green onions, some Sriracha or other hot chile, soy sauce, a splash of fish sauce, fried garlic chips. Whatever you add, it will be good.

Pan-Fried Salmon with Garlic and Capers

Or, more accurately, my husband's pan-fried salmon with garlic and capers. He makes this dish, I never have.

Season the salmon with garlic powder, paprika, a little rosemary, salt and pepper. Fry in about a half inch of canola/vegetable oil until done. Let it get crispy at the edges - yes, it's technically over-cooked, but the crispy bits are really the best part.

Remove the fish to drain on paper. Saute minced garlic and capers in a mix of butter and olive oil until they start getting a little crispy. People always say "don't burn the garlic", and this isn't exactly burnt, but it's crispy. And good. Pour the garlic/caper/fat mixture over the fish.

Served with zucchini, potatoes, garlic cloves, shallots and pearl onions roasted with olive oil, salt and pepper, this was an awesome, if garlic-heavy, meal.

Non-Food Post - Books Read in 2010

I seem to have dropped off in my reading, only 24 books in 2010. My favorites were Proust was a Neuroscientist by Jonah Lehrer and The Road by Cormac McCarthy. Honorable mention goes to Full Dark, No Stars, because it seems like Stephen King is finally returning to the writer he used to be.

With no further adieu, the list:

The Sopranos Family Cookbook: As Compiled by Artie Bucco – Allen Rucker, Michele Schicolone

The Hellbound Heart – Clive Barker

Donnie Brasco – Joseph D. Pistone

Proust was a Neuroscientist – Jonah Lehrer

Shadow of Albion – Andre Norton and Rosemary Edgehill

The Elves of Cintra – Terry Brooks

Veronika Decides to Die – Paulo Coelho

Eleven Minutes – Paulo Coelho

The Stranger – Albert Camus

The Living Dead – John Joseph Adams, ed.

Eat, Pray, Love – Elizabeth Gilbert

A Homemade Life – Molly Wizenberg

The Witch of Portobello – Paulo Coelho

Shadow & Claw – Gene Wolfe

Sword & Citadel – Gene Wolfe

Rant – Chuck Palahniuk

The Road – Cormac McCarthy

A Thousand Splendid Suns – Khaled Hosseini

The Lovely Bones – Alice Sebold

Bloodstone – Nate Kenyon

The Tartar Steppe – Dino Buzzati

Gomorrah – Roberto Saviano

The Shack – Wm. Paul Young

Full Dark, No Stars – Stephen King

What did you read?

Thai Papaya Salad

Do you ever crave something you've never had before? No? Just me?

A while back, I was craving som tam (ส้มตำ), Thai green papaya salad, even though I had never had it before. Just looking at the list of ingredients, I knew I wanted it, knew I would love it. Shredded unripe papaya, tomatoes, green beans, dried shrimp, peanuts, hot chiles, lime juice, sugar, fish sauce. I finally had it for the first time at Sab E Lee, and, seriously, I could do shots of the dressing, it's that good. Then recently I decided I needed to make it myself.

So I consulted with Leela from She Simmers, using her recipe, and asking her a couple questions along the way. I have a mortar and pestle, but it's the Mexican kind with the rough granite. My instinct told me I needed a smooth-sided mortar to make som tam, so I used a large cutting board and a metal bowl, and alternated between the granite pestle and my meat tenderizer. Don't laugh. It worked.

Aside from an altercation with the vegetable peeler, in which I removed a fair-sized chunk from my thumb, everything came together nicely. Lots of pounding, crushing, mixing, more pounding. It's a fair amount of work for a salad, but any time I get to pound on things, it's worth it.

Will I make it again? Hell, yes. But I think I'll ask my husband to peel the papaya.